Ticketing Office - Phase 1

She twitched her full head of black curls back and stood a little straighter as the lady in front moved out of the line and out of sight. Just a few minutes more to her turn. The boy who manned the counter cocked his head to the side to count the remaining candidates and sighed as he registered the masses of people queuing up all the way out the glass sliding doors.

Jan bounced a little on the balls of her feet while watching the people who passed by her. Her suit was immaculately ironed and she had bought a new pair of shoes just for today. She was just waiting to pick up her tickets so she could get to the interview buildings on time and hopefully be back in time to get a hot meal with the tickets.

Today was a busy day in the ticketing office. The boy's chocolate brown mop of curls bobbed up and down as he scampered from one end of the counter to the other. He was so fast that Jan actually saw two of him. And then she blinked to clear her vision. Apparently, there really were two of him. A third curly mass of hair in that same shade of chocolate brown popped up behind the counter. Ok, there were three. She breathed a sigh of amazement.

The owner of the ticketing office must have been pretty rich in order to afford to buy all three clones. They never really came cheap although they were actually just slaves. Cheap labour. The irony of it however was that ever since humans stopped producing children, nothing was cheap anymore. And love was almost impossible considering that there were at least a dozen other people out there who looked, talked and walked like you. People would fall in love with the wrong clone and then there would be a repeat of the Sibling Murders.

The world was a chaotic mess. And in the midst of it all, she still had to line up in order to buy meal tickets. The absurdity of it all.

~Rei Shiori

1st kiss

I remember that first time,
You kissed me,
A little clumsier,
Than all the rest before you,
That's true,
But still,
I never thought,
That one day,
I'd need you as much,
As I now do.

~Rei Shiori

This world

Running in a world,
That just won't let me be,
Pushing,
Struggling,
Chasing,
Always be something else,
Someone other than me,
They put you in cages,
Lock you out and down,
Drown out your voice,
Set you in shadows,
Ignore every other expression,
So only on the inside you can frown,
They set you up to fail,
And then make a hue and cry,
When you're kicked down.

~Rei Shiori

Bottom of my dreams

Maybe we've all lost our way,
Time receding,
Memories flowing away,
Like the sand in the hourglass,
I still keep by my bed,
Every grain locked away,
Forgotten ,
But still it remains,
Engraved,
In the bottom of my dreams.

~Rei Shiori

It was enough

She looked like,
A good girl gone bad,
All tough cookie on the outside,
But alone,
Her eyes were sad,
She still made those jokes,
She knew would make them laugh,
But alone at night,
She contemplates,
What forced them,
To leave her somewhere,
Along the path,
And the edges of her essence,
Grew a little bit more rough,
So she put on her mask,
Faked it to get through the days,
It was enough.

~Rei Shiori

A cat's view of owner

I am unsure,
If these are pitiful,
Fools,
In the hands of a puppeteer,
Are worth a second glance,
Will you be of use to me?
My eyes view you,
Askance.

~Rei Shiori

600th post : Thank you!!

This is the 600th post since I first started this blog. I'm not sure if it's become more like a diary in prose form or the ranting space I originally intended it to be, but either way, I am happy. Here. Now. With all that I have. Thank you to everyone who has read and visited my blog even though there are no comments or anything. Thank you for taking the time to look through my amateur poetry. Also a huge thank you to the people who helped me to write, kept me going, and gave me the motivation to continue this blog. Thank you to my guest blogger, Selene-chan who constantly fills in for me when my internet connection rebels. Thank you everyone. THANK YOU!!!!!

I started out a long time ago,
In anger,
My first post I wrote,
Darkened by the tears,
My keyboard drenched,
I cried as I typed in,
Every tug on my heart,
Every pull,
Every wrench,
Grew little by little,
My blog and I,
Almost a year later,
I can finally write with a smile,
I'm in love,
And not just with words,
My life is not perfect,
But the scars,
No longer hurt,
Still I won't give up,
My diary of prose,
I'll write every day,
For maybe who knows,
Someone out there,
Will find my words,
In times,
When they need them most.

~Rei Shiori

Thanks for being my readers :) I love you all. Minna, arigatou gozaimasu.

Like dust

Time seems to stop for now,
As we walk along the path,
Looking back into the water,
I reminisce about the past,
And a ripple breaks the surface,
The memories scatter,
Like dust.

~Rei Shiori

Remembering

When does it become too much?
Begin again,
I can't remember the last time,
It touched,
A memory,
The embers have all left me.

~Rei Shiori

Unsure

No longer sure,
Of what to believe,
The ones I've known,
All my life,
Or the one,
That gives me,
Better reasons to,
Remain alive,
A little more meaning,
Each time,
I breathe,
What would you choose,
If you flip the coin,
Suspended in the air,
Perhaps it will,
Force me,
To mark my own point.

~Rei Shiori

Guilt

That tinge of regret I feel,
Every time,
Just a little,
Enough to make me,
Guilt-ridden,
I speak,
And you listen,
The frustration,
Gnaws away,
Just a little,
Every day.

~Rei Shiori

Let's not fight

Keep me in your arms tonight,
Let me dream the pain away,
Hold me closer,
Let's not fight,
Leave the anger,
To fade away,
With the dawning light.

~Rei Shiori

Karma's cost

I am not,
A second hand replacement,
For all that you lost,
You had it coming to you,
When you betrayed me,
This is the delayed price,
Karma's cost,
That I paid,
For you to be snared in,
A small payment,
For the tears shed,
And trust lost.

~Rei Shiori

Essence of you

Curl up,
Empty spaces,
My fingers,
Aching,
I trace,
Mazes,
On the bedsheets,
Where you lay,
The curves of your body still,
My memory replays,
And my fingers swirl,
The indentations,
Are filled,
With the essence,
Of you.

~Rei Shiori

Snow white?

Lush she sleeps,
Beneath the bower,
The girl who would not be tamed,
Left in eternal slumber,
Eyelids twitching,
She fights to wake,
But all who see,
Cannot see beyond,
Her perfect make,
Is a soul screaming to be free,
Day by day her frustration grows,
And with it,
Her hate.

~Rei Shiori

Back to reality

Racing through,
The endless corridors of time,
Can barely breathe,
It's back,
To the daily grind.

~Rei Shiori

To a bitch I know

I wondered,
If I cursed you,
Would you go any deeper,
Into your grave,
Than you already are,
Pitiful creature,
Unfit to live,
Why will you not,
Cease,
To,
Exist?
Why choose to torment,
Those of us,
Who wish to live,
And believe,
There is a God,
Who will deal,
With the shit you give.

~Rei Shiori

You don't care

Would you take it all away,
Every shred of emotion I have,
AM I NOT HUMAN?
Not to you,
Can I not feel,
Not behave,
As I am,
Would you control even that?
I cannot pretend to be alright,
When I am not even close there,
Yet you keep forcing me,
YOU DON'T CARE!

~Rei Shiori

Drowning sorrows in ink

He touches her face again,
Paper to skin,
Ink lands,
To draw your sorrows,
With care-worn hands,
Each line traces her cheek,
That he could never have held,
She was never his,
It was never a plan,
To be the one she'd kiss,
Far-fetched enough,
No fairy tale existed,
To fulfill that wish,
He would have insisted,
The fairy was a sham,
Every broken dream,
Led him back to her,
Yet again,
Why love one,
Who was unwilling,
And didn't even see him as a man?

~Rei Shiori

Her thoughts are mice

Her thoughts are mice,
Running deeper,
Into the house,
Of cards and lies,
She's crumbling,
A little brick,
Every day,
They gnaw at her,
But the scars remain.

~Rei Shiori

Ripple Effect 5 (a Beginning continuation)

I wonder what Maxwell could want with us. I hope he doesn’t give us another case to work on. I’m still exhausted from the last one and that was a week ago. Well, I knew it wouldn’t be easy the day I accepted the offer to be a member of the Hidden Clave. Arianna retreated to her walk-in-closet to retrieve a change of clothes. Shuffling through the countless tops that hung neatly in her closet, she pursed her lips as she tried to decide between the black cashmere sweater that had metallic runes woven into the hems and a soft chiffon blouse the colour of cornflowers that had embroidery around its neckline.But back then Gabriel was still alive to lead the group. She settled on the chiffon blouse and a pair of black slacks but packed the sweater into her bag just in case. Picking her outfits from among so many choices always gave her a headache.She let out a sigh and proceeded to the bathroom for a cold shower.

Dominic was lying in bed with the white sheets twisted around his waist, showing off his broad shoulders and nearly all of his lean-muscled body. His platinum blond hair stood out in unruly spikes, gleaming palely against the black pillowcase with golden flowers. A sheen of sweat covered his skin courtesy of the dream he was having before just before Adrian’s phone call had abruptly woken him from his slumber. It wasn’t an unfamiliar dream, but he treated it as a sign of some sort. Whether it was a good or bad omen, it was something he himself had to figure out. Even awake he could recall Gabriel’s exact words.

They were in Gabriel’s room at The Cove having a drink and simply admiring the panoramic view of the city. Gabriel’s strong, lean frame was silhouetted by the bright lights of the city as he stood by the window looking down at the traffic that seemed to never end even in the wee hours of the day while Dominic sat comfortably on the leather armchair facing him. The meeting was impromptu and Dominic couldn’t help but feel that something was amiss, so he just sat there staring at his best friend while Gabriel appeared lost in thought. Just as he was going to take a sip of wine, Gabriel spoke up.

‘Dominic, I have a favour to ask of you, but first I need you to answer a question with absolute honesty.’ he said grimly without taking his eyes off the view.

Dominic answered without so much as a pause, ’You know I would do you any favour if it is in my power, but it is the mysterious question that sparks my curiosity. I give you my word that I will answer your question truthfully.’  He got up from the chair and headed towards where Gabriel was standing just as he voiced out the promise.

‘Do you love my sister?’. Dominic stopped dead in his tracks. The question was so much of a shock to him that he almost lost his grip on the wine glass in his possession. Had he heard wrongly? He turned to look at Gabriel just to make sure that he hadn’t. Gabriel was now looking at him with a stern look on his face that made Dominic slightly fearful. How did he know? It took me two years to realise it myself, he thought as his heart raced.

Gabriel upon reading the look on his face said, ‘Remember you gave me your word Dominic and I know your word isn’t just an empty promise. I need to know how you feel about Arianna.’ Even though his mind was blank, Gabriel was right, he did give his word and to him that meant something unlike some men who dismissed it as if they were mere words. 

In Nocturne, many would use words as binding promises that lasted lifetimes, words held power and they were no joke, nevertheless there were tricksters that wriggled through loopholes of incomplete or wrongly worded promises. He was not one of them. Mustering up what little courage that was left after the shock of the question, Dominic answered, ‘Yes, I do love her.’ Dominic hadn’t realise he was staring at the wine until he looked up at Gabriel to saw the relief in his eyes and a smile that seemed to cast away the tension that had built up while he had been waiting for his answer.

‘I’m so glad to hear you admit it Dominic. In my eyes you’re the perfect match for her. However, after the incident with Christine I doubt that you can climb over the wall that she has built around her heart.’ Dominic was about to speak, to assure him that he would try despite that but was cut off by Gabriel’s smooth voice.

‘And now about the favour that I was going to ask you.’ there was a pause as he strode towards Dominic to stand in front of him.

‘I need you to take care of Arianna if anything ever happens to me. I need your word Dominic. I know it’s a selfish favour to askof you but you’re the only person I can entrust my twin to. Even if the both of you don’t end up together I know you will keep her safe.’ he said while looking him straight in the eye. 

Something nagged at him, a growing feeling of worry and unease built into a hard knot in his chest at the mention of that, the urgency in Gabriel’s voice bothered him, ’Why are you asking me this now,Gabe? Are you or Ari in danger?’ he voiced the question with genuine concern.

Gabriel waved his hand in an attempt to dismiss any ominous feeling he had, ’No, no we’re both fine. I just wanted to make sure Ari has someone she can trust and depend on just in case I’m not available. Now what is your answer Dom?’ He wanted to ask Gabriel more about his intentions regarding the favour but something in Gabriel’s eyes told Dominic that the topic was not open for discussion.

Dominic didn’t even need to think about it before his answer left his lips, ‘It would be a privilege to make sure Arianna is safe and sound. I give you my word I will protect her as if she were mine.’

Just then Adrian called bearing some rather unsettling news, taking his mind off the promise he made to Gabriel a month before he had passed away.

~by S.Dawn & R.Shiori

Oblivion

Sinking down,
Deeper than where,
The hell hounds,
Of memory go,
Oblivion,
Sweet eternal rest,
Away from my reality's mess,
Take me home,
Oblivion,
I travel again,
Into the unknown,
Wipe clean the slate,
Screw old times sake,
I'm not going back,
No more,
Oblivion,
I'll walk through it,
That open door.

~Rei Shiori

Old as the sea

I feel ancient,
Old as the seas,
Every wave breaking,
Breaks another part of me,
Drifting away,
Ocean-tossed,
I am but driftwood,
A strand of seaweed,
Lost.

~Rei Shiori

Enter

Enter,
She begins again,
Each step,
An echo of the past,
Across the dusty floor,
Remain,
The endless scars,
From night after night,
Of endless pain,
Writhing in the moments,
That spin in her brain.

~Rei Shiori

Drunken confession

The nights spent,
Swimming at the bottom,
Of another half full,
Shot of whiskey,
Burning the pit of her stomach,
Coughing,
Retching up,
The dry memories,
Turned to dust,
In her throat,
He used to caress,
And she watches the world go by,
In a bleary mess,
Drunken secrets,
She'll regret them tomorrow,
All she confessed.

~Rei Shiori

As you

To let you in again,
Foolish dog,
I would be insane,
The liar and cheater,
You became,
Taught me enough,
To be wary,
Of one as unashamed,
As you.

~Rei Shiori

Realm of sleep

I wonder if they'll come tonight,
The itching,
Twitching,
Burning,
Nightmares,
That make me clench,
Nails biting into palm,
Teeth down,
I am disarmed,
In the realm of sleep.

~Rei Shiori

Who was my rain

So it's hello again,
I once wondered when,
But now you're here,
I can't see,
For all the sand,
Grains of aching pain,
Accumulated through the years,
Disappeared just like that,
I'm not sure,
Who was my rain.

~Rei Shiori

Another day

Rushing by she stops,
Breathe,
Redeem,
The spinning world,
Stop for a moment again,
And she is glad,
To be alive another day.

~Rei Shiori

The radical hero

Nobody wants to be the hero,
The first in line to die,
Fade into the background,
Be a zero,
That's what they tell you,
All your life,
Shy away from,
The radical spotlight,
Run,
As far as you can,
From the harsh sights,
Pretend not to see injustice,
Pretend not to admit to fear,
So nobody grows up a hero,
Because nobody wants,
To be in jail.

~Rei Shiori

Hush now

Hush now,
She rocks the child asleep,
But she's the one who's crying,
She's the one who weeps,
Hush now,
That's what he said to her,
One hand above her mouth,
Shutting in her fear,
Hush now,
They scream at her at night,
For shame the neighbours hear them,
They rant and rail and fight,
Hush now,
They take her to the room,
Quiet and clinical,
They tell her it's demon spawn,
It should meet its doom,
Hush now,
She holds it in her arms,
The face is her own,
But now they are beyond harm,
Hush now,
It opens its eyes,
Don't fear my darling,
Mummy will follow you beyond the light.

~Rei Shiori