How is it where you are?

How is it where you are?
So close to me,
Yet so far,
I'd take the train,
Just to get back to you,
But please be there,
Don't shut me out in the cold.

~Rei Shiori

Paranoid in gray

I'm not sure if,
I can believe myself anymore,
Or if it's you,
That my heart can't believe in,
I worry more often than sleep,
And when sleep does come,
I wake up weeping,
Where are the dreams,
That used to make me smile,
As I woke up,
And turned around,
To cuddle you for a while,
Where are the "I love you"s,
That used to come so freely,
It seems like you're so distant now,
Is it you,
Or just paranoid me?
I asked you not to leave,
But it seemed to only make you angry,
What can I do,
That doesn't push you further away,
What was black and white once,
Is now gray.

~Rei Shiori