For forever

Here we go again,
Staring this familiar question,
Straight in the eye,
Wondering about all the previous 'If's and 'Why's,
Hoping it'll work out this time,
Afraid of might happen,
If there'll be hell to pay for wanting,
Something that can never seem to be mine,
Can you tell me honestly that you won't let me down?
I cannot let go of the pain yet,
Even if you're to be my clown,
It will hurt for days to come,
Perhaps months or a lifetime still,
But will you take this damaged heart,
And try to heal it with your will?
Maybe we're going to fast,
Maybe it's just a dream,
I can't imagine it happening to me,
Please don't let what I feel be a sin,
I can't say it,
These simple three words,
I can't hear it,
Without making this dam of memories burst,
Take it away,
Make it ok,
Just stop the pain from invading my days,
I don't want to remember the past times together,
Make this time a memory for forever.

~Rei Shiori